One Eyed Vanessa Monster

The night of the Mekong Delta Day trip, I ran into some girls at dinner who invited me to go out with them. Larissa, Jenna, and I headed to Lions Den- where they had liters of beer for 3 US dollars. Amazingly cheap. Anyways, so my eye had been bothering me all day. So I dragged my contact off my eye, hoping to clear my contact. When it didn’t come on, I got up to go to the bathroom annoyed. Turns out my contact had ripped in two. It was the very beginning of the night, we just got there, and the shuttle took at least half an hour one way until the ship. So I had to suck it up. Now, I can’t see. Really. The big E? You couldn’t pay me a thousand dollars to read a word that size. So the entire night I had one eye perfectly clear, and the other painfully blurry. For a while we tried making a patch out of a napkin. Trying to explain eye patch in Vietnamese? Not so much.

After a while a group of us walked to Blue Geico nearby. We hung out there, where I proceeded to tell the RA’s my story, and why I would sporadically talk with one eye closed. Eventually we made it to Apocolypse Now. The driver told Larissa and I we both owed a dollar, even though it was five seconds away. I refused, and ran in without paying, leaving behind a very angry driver. After a while I lost my friends so I started dancing with a bunch of locals. The entire place was packed with SASer’s so it really didn’t matter. I broke away and started talking with a bunch of Australians for a while. After a long night, I found some SASer’s going home and headed back- one eye and all. Needless to say, I paid up for it in the morning. I woke up cross-eyed. After watching Alvin and the Chipmunks (we have no control over the TV channels, obviously), I finally dragged myself out of bed and into the city. They made us wait in the boiling hot shuttle bus for an hour, sans air conditioning or even shade. Finally, we got into the city. I dragged myself to the rail pass station, had to wait in line with half of SAS, and meandered through the market by myself. After shopping, I ran out of things to do solo (and money). On the plus side, I was feeling better. I walked into a mall which coincidentally and totally unplanned (not) had a spa. Behold: my very first massage! I’ll force my sister to massage me, but she doesn’t count. 1) She’s not a professional. 2) She’s twelve. So I think it’s safe to say it was my first big deal massage. Anyways, so this women just strips you down like its nothing, then lays you on the bed, and before you know it she just jumps on the table and straddles you. Anyways, it was $14.20 plus tip. Crazy, huh? Afterwards, I went to a coffee shop. They told me they took credit card, so I went and sat on the ledge, overlooking the square. When the check came, they looked at my card like they had never seen one before. Cash only. Well, well, well. See, I had bargained with a lady earlier and told her I’ve give her every penny I had- 10 dollars- for two Roxy book bags. Now, I knew I lied, but that still only left me with 40,000 dong. My bill? 45,000. So as I clearly sitting there, digging for money, everyone is looking at me with interest. Silly American. These Brits are just smoking and drinking like no big deal. Keep in mind 5,000 dong= 30 cents or so. Luckily they let me slide, but really now, is it that hard to lend someone 30 cents? I meet up with Lauren, Ali, and Stephanie. We head towards the market to have dinner. On our way back we spilt up to get our dresses. I figured it would only take me a minute or so. As I walk into the store, there was already trouble. A bunch of SAS girls were sitting around complaining. One was yelling and throwing a fit. She walked out with a bunch of clothes without paying for them. Another left to go pay with a credit card, but they took her and didn’t come back for an hour. I decided to go get to an ATM so I wouldn’t have to walk several blocks to charge it to my card. ATM number one: No. ATM number one again: No. ATM number two: No. ATM number three: Occupied by Asian man who is taking far too exceedingly long. Ten minutes later, ATM number three: REJECTED. So I walk back, contemplating which dress to leave behind. I can’t leave my mom’s, that’s just mean. I suppose I could leave the pink one, it looks like a potato sack. I mean, what stranger would lend me 76 dollars? Especially when no one could even spare 33 cents?? And you know what? That night, after showing off my three dress (not worth 150, but definitely an experience in and of itself), I walked to Libby’s room and paid her back every cent. A stranger. A perfect stranger. The world is full of surprises.